August 19, 2018 – Aside from the fact that Alice Cooper is my new go-to listen-to when I’m in the mood for rock (there’s so much of his music that’s new to me because I always (wrongly) thought the songs, other than the major hits, were too dark), there was a great deal I took out of my recent Alice Cooper concert. This isn’t so much a review, but a list of the top Tips of Alice, a story of what I learned from Alice. And no, not golf tips….

The first Tip of Alice requires a story. The year was 1998. I had just left my job in big-law, not voluntarily; I would have stayed forever, but the firm closed, and I didn’t want to work for anyone else, so I started my own thing. That’s definitely a for-better-or-for-worse thing because it’s almost impossible to go back, but it is what happened. My sister was mobile then. She knew she had MS, and it affected her then, but only slightly, just annoying things like numbness. She worked then. She was single then. Sort of. Her boyfriend was the man she would marry, but, then, he wasn’t the dominant and ever-present force he would become. In that time frame, she used to visit me often. Her work was headquartered in the Los Angeles area, so she would get business trips, think expense account, and we would make that expense account fund some pretty cool little outings, fancy dinners at nice places, the rest of the food being lunch packed from my house. Of course, she saved on hotel too, so we would get that to fund our dinner outings.

Having spent a handful of long weekends with me, we decided she, make that we, should see more of California. So we planned this trip: Summer of 1998, we would take my car, drive up to San Francisco, then travel down the coast, stay a day or so in every pretty place. The first day; however, the car broke, and by broke, I mean the oil change place didn’t put the oil cap back on, and I didn’t check it before we left — oops, so sometime in the night, as we were driving, the car’s oil light came on. I stopped in some town, put in oil, not realizing I had fixed it; still, our first stop was the Mercedes dealership in Bakersfield. They pronounced the car fixed, didn’t charge anything, and we were off to San Fran. It took hours to find a place that would allow us to stay with my dog, and honestly, my dog wasn’t too happy. The moral of that story is that we ended up, after one day of Napa and leaving the dog in the Travel Lodge, San Francisco, going to Monterey. There’s a nice Best Western there with fireplaces and a hot tub, and that place is fully dog friendly. Even my dog thought so. So there we stayed for the remainder of our week trip, ate lunch in Santa Barbara – another intended, but not fully realized stop — on the way back to Los Angeles. What’s the point of this story? It’s just the last time I did anything with my sister. I never took her to a concert, and always thought her too sweet for any of my concert adventures. She was for nice dinners and that one amazing trip. I would even alter my music listening habits around her. She got married about eighteen months after that trip. Then came two kids, and in the process, she lost her mobility to MS. It takes an army of equipment for her to go anywhere, an anywhere that never includes Los Angeles, and she never goes without her husband. It’s just not the same vibe that way. So thinking of the words concert and sister in the same sentence is not a normal occurrence for me, except in recent years she told me she wished I had taken her to one back in the day. I never even knew she had never seen a rock concert.

So there I am, at the Alice Cooper concert, and for some reason, all I can think about are the stairs everywhere. Out of the corner of my eyes, I kept looking for an elevator, you know… for my sister. What? Why was I doing that? And a concert like Alice? My, my, Alice is not fit for my sweet little sister. Taylor Swift? Yes, Taylor Swift, and indeed, my sister has seen Taylor Swift. Nevertheless, I kept thinking of my sister. My sister should have been at Alice. Turns out, aside from the mock head-chopping, the concert was amazing, tame even, super tight musically, a rehearsed, choreographed and planned stage show. And more importantly, the songs were fun rock ‘n’ roll.  And that brings up the second Tip of Alice. It’s the reason why my sister should have been there.

There is so much talk of bucket lists, things we should do, concerts we should see before they are no more. I get that. I think we should. But none of these concerts are like they were in the past. I think that’s why I have regret for having never taken my sister to a rock show when we were young. She never got to see anyone when they were what made them who they are. That’s hard for me to imagine, because honestly I don’t have a bucket list on concerts. I’ve seen everyone I would have wanted to see, and in their prime, except Led Zeppelin. And that’s probably not possible, bucket list or not. Even so, as far as bucket lists go, for me, no matter how good it is to see these bands, it’s not the same. The crowds are not the same, the vibe is not the same, and I know I find myself making excuses for the sound being just a little bit lesser. I mean these artists are older now; we can forgive a little deterioration in voice quality, a little deterioration in stage personality.

Alice Cooper. On paper, this should be just like that, a little deterioration we tolerate. After all, Alice is 70. But dare I say it though, I actually prefer 70-year-old Alice Cooper. Okay, I’ll grant you, I never saw Alice in the 80s, certainly not in the 70s; remember, I thought he was too dark, too male, but from what I can see on YouTube, he is better now.

Alice is still vital now, completely fit, and I don’t mind a wrinkle or two … or ten. His hair is normal. His clothes are similar. So it’s like looking at the same thing, and honestly, with him, I prefer the way he looks now. Who knows, perhaps it’s the makeup; perhaps hiding behind black raccoon make-up is a disguise for age, but honestly, his look works such that I don’t even think of his age. And his voice? If there is deterioration, I don’t hear it. It’s why he can still sing the words I’m Eighteen, and not have to have the crowd sing them.

Then there’s his band. The bands of the ‘80s liked to emphasize a guitar star. This band has its guitar star in Nita Strauss, and my fangirl-ness for her and her playing is no secret, but really, she shared the stage with the other guitarists. The sound of that was unparalleled to any concert I’ve ever seen. As Alice conducted them playing Lord of the Flies, it was like watching a guitar orchestra. Sign me up! I’ll take that any day over just one player. And still, I got that solo moment with Nita as well. It was the best of all worlds for a guitar fangirl.

The activity level was amazing too. Everyone performed in a manner that never left me thinking, hey that was a good kick, or jump, or move, or whatever … for a 70-year-old. No, I never once thought that. It was just good. It was a concert worthy of yesteryear. Bucket list? There’s no bucket anywhere in sight. Alice is the material of time machines.

So what are the Tips of Alice? They are simple. Number one: don’t judge the music of Alice as being something that is too dark, too male, too much. That’s for me, actually, as I listen to this artist I only knew at a surface level, having found a new rock love. That goes for my sister too. She might be sweet in her musical taste, but she would have loved it, and it was the reason I thought of her. And the second tip: forget the bucket list. Just try to do it at a top-notch-level, always. He’s proof that you don’t have to get old, that you can still do whatever you want, save for some disease like MS that takes something from you. So I will push my physical and mental and musical abilities in the same way as Alice does; defy the bucket. I want to; I want to for me and for my sister. Heck, following Alice, I want to try to be a better version of myself than I was decades ago. I mean, if Alice can….

Oh, and I have decided. Somehow, someway, my sister’s first concert with me is going to be Alice Cooper. Because with this one, I really will get a do-over – the ability to take my sister with me to a real rock ‘n’ roll show, just like the old days, and I mean just like the old days. Heck, even better than before.