September 9, 2018 – When you were a kid, who were you heroes: athletes, musicians, doctors, firefighters, astronauts, the President, teachers, coaches, your parents? Each are likely heroes, but I’m none of those, so can honestly say I’ve never been any kid’s hero.  But along comes 2018, a time when we long for things from the past; we long for anything ‘80s. And what I did well, or at least stereotypically, was the ‘80s. My particular specialty, other than attracting attention to myself, was dance. Humm, on second thought, perhaps that’s the same thing.

I suppose I have what they call natural ability. I learned the first of what I know of dance by watching TV. I can see moves and copy them, almost exactly, so when I was very young, I watched ballets on public television and learned by dancing along. Eventually I would take real classes. I suppose dance in various forms was one of my favorite things from my youth, certainly not something that was to make any money, but the thing I love to do the most of anything. Well, horseback riding, I love that too, but then again I did try to dance on the horses. But that is a story for another time.

Dance made me a temporal star, meaning a star for that time of my life. Perhaps it was the times; perhaps it’s a symptom of someone who peaked in high school, that latter phrase something that makes me keep much of my love for these things to myself. That and in the real world, most people weren’t that girl, you know, cheerleader, baton twirler, drill team member. No you have to keep that to yourself because people hate that girl, and outside of my very good friends, and the people here, I never talk about these things. But still, in the ‘80s, dance was almost as important to popular culture as the guitar was, and I made the most of it, unabashedly made the most of it.

At the start of the ‘80s, I encountered my first taste of what would become the serious ‘80s craze — aerobics. My best friend, connected to all hip things as she was, took me along with her to a meeting hall at the University of Texas where I was student, and we danced (if you can call the hopping they did dance). The room was full of other “me’s”, young women who lived those earlier years as that girl. Seriously, we can tell…. They called that class Jazzercise, and I took about three Jazzercise classes, I would estimate, before my money for such things ran out. My money for food ran out too, but that subject, like the dancing on the horses, is for another time.

I really did like the classes though, so when I graduated college and moved back to my mom’s house, motivated by a need to find some friends, and armed with my little work salary to pay for such things as aerobics class, I went to a health club, a nice one, and signed up for a membership. The aerobics classes were free with the membership. I went to my first aerobics class, and made fast friends with the teacher. As these classes go for me (and even now, although I have no idea why because I’m a total mess compared to those days), the teacher approached me to discuss my dance background. She said I should try out for instructor and helped me do that. I was hired, went through the training, but then changed all the moves to things I made up, consisting of little 8-count dance steps that I combined into groups of four sets. I started with a night class that had two people in it. I added person after person until I had the largest class in the chain. And my students could actually dance. I had them looking like they were straight out of Thriller. I remember the health club touring people by my class. They called it their dance-y aerobics class, and whenever anyone was scared off by that description I made a point of bringing them in. I used to tell these people I could teach anyone to dance, and promised a good workout too. I don’t know if it’s a symptom of the ‘80s that this stuff was super acceptable, or if I was just delusional, but even then I still felt like I was a star.

Like all things of the ‘80s, even this started to change. As the ‘80s turned to the ‘90s, and I became more involved in intellectual pursuits, I soon discovered these intellectual types that were the key to my ability to work didn’t appreciate my dance background. And forget that past history of my high school days. When any intellectual would find out I was a high school baton twirler it was grounds for being fired for being a not serious non-intellectual, despite the fact that I was quite good, and that it took hours and hours of practice a day, and with that I still made honor grades, that I choreographed everything, including many of the moves for the 300-person band I fronted, that I choreographed everything for that health club as well. No matter the work, not matter that I could do both, that word “bimbo”, I couldn’t be viewed as one of those. I even had a boss once say I shouldn’t tell anyone at work, ever, that I was a twirler or that I taught aerobics. Funny thing though, when he had a former college cheerleader turned business owner for a client, all bets were off. No, then he and the older partners used me as a selling tool, even brought me into the high level meetings with that client. The reason? Well, of course, girls like us can see another of us. Oh and I said that already too.

Fast forward to 2018. I’m at dinner with my brother and sister while in Texas. My sister brought one of her children, her son. He is 12 years old, going on about 9, and by that, I mean he’s really innocent and childlike. He is addicted to video games, so normally he doesn’t participate in discussion because he just wants to play his game. But for reasons I’ll keep to myself, I’m determined to have a relationship with him. My nephew’s game used to be Minecraft. He has shown me that game before, and I’ve heard him tell me many, many times that he got a new mod, but I have no idea what that means, no idea what any of it means, no idea what the attraction is. I was expecting Minecraft to dominate that dinner, but as things go with young boys, Minecraft has been replaced. The new game is Fortnite. That night my nephew had no desire to play this new game though. He just wanted to ask me questions. And the crazy part, like the really crazy part – he was looking at me with an interest I had never seen.

My nephew asked me about three times “do you know how to dance”, “my mom told me you know how to dance”, “can you show me how to do a dance”? Then the ultimate question: “is it true you were an aerobics teacher”, a question he asked with an elevated tone in his voice and his face showing this look of total respect and amazement.

Remember my conditioning, post ‘80s – never talk about dance, twirling, and aerobics, that’s completely out of the question. I must never admit to being a bimbo. Plus there’s the fact that I’m not at all in dance shape right now, so even if I wanted to acknowledge my skills, former or in need of training, I wouldn’t. My responses to the first questions were I can dance, but I’m rusty. The aerobics teacher question, especially with my nephew’s expression, I just shook my head and looked at my sister. Honestly, I thought this had to be a set up.

My sister explained there’s a character in Fortnite, a girl who’s dressed as an aerobics teacher; my sister said the character is really cute, she’s a major deal, and super cool and strong. In fact, she’s an assassin, the Aerobics Assassin. My sister said my nephew loves the Aerobics Assassin. My sister told me her son had showed here the character, and my sister had told my nephew I used to dress like that – tights, leotard, leg warmers. My nephew chimed in asking if it was really true that I wore leg warmers. Still not sure what to say, I answered, yes, adding I still put on leg warmers from time to time. Habit, you know.

Begging for an explanation, my nephew showed me the Aerobic Assassin; that’s really her name. Sure enough, she’s a character wearing normal aerobics teacher clothes from the ‘80s.  My sister kept assuring me this character is really cool, that all of this is a compliment. My nephew showed me dance moves the character does, although he didn’t explain how this fits into the game, just that the game’s fans are all over the Internet trying to copy the dances. Apparently, lots of the games’ characters dance. That was the point of all the questions about whether I could do dance moves – this game’s followers are the coolest and best if they can copy the dance moves for real. And aerobics teachers? They are heroes! Unlikely, and completely contrary to the latter part of my life, but hey, even if it’s for a crazy reason, it’s good to be a hero.

It took until I got home to really look up the game and this character, the Aerobic Assassin. I still don’t really get it, but from what I can see, the ‘80s-inspired Aerobic Assassin is a major big deal. I have to say, I think I love this character. I also love it that gamers like my nephew are getting up and learning to dance, … or wanting to. And somehow I feel vindicated for every time I had to hide that part of my life. I really, really hope all those intellectuals (who incidentally are not a part of my life anymore) have some person in their life who is going crazy over the Aerobics Assassin. Mind you, I know I should promote my nephew viewing normal role models as heroes – how about an astronaut, or a pilot, but this is really fun.

Now to watch these videos. I have some dances to learn. Hopefully I have them down by the time of my next Texas visit. There are good reasons to; I’ll get two really amazing things – a bonding experience with my nephew … and my dance body back. Now… where are those leg warmers?